Playing Nice with the Childed In-Laws, Part I

On Saturday my husband and I went to the Design/Sales office of the conglomerate in which the apartment his father will be buying/we will be renting is located. My SIL was* the agents' contact person for the deal, so I expected her to join us. What I did not expect was her loud, obnoxious husband and precious 18-mo-old Sneauxphlayche to join us, but they did.  I was not thrilled. But you know how sometimes you think you have a shitty situation, but something happens to let you know that you narrowly missed an even shittier situation? Well, that happened when the younger agent spotted Sneauxphlayche and cooed, "Ohhh! If I'd have known you'd be here, I would've brought my little one!" One Precious Princess was enough.** (No surprise there.)

As we picked out the colors and patterns for the fixtures and furnishings, I did my best to ignore PP's singing to herself, touching everything, scribbling on the table (hey, if the agents can't tell her to stop, I'm not going to), babbling, and general running around and talking to herself (loudly of course)...while her parents alternately ignored and indulged her. I hit my limit when we (agent Mommy, SIL, BIL, PP, and their poorly trained Jack Russell, and my husband and I) were visiting our unfurnished, unfinished apartment. PP and Jack, with Enrique's encouragement, were running around like idiots, with much squealing, shouting, and barking. Agent Mommy chose that moment to say directly to me, "You will have to be careful with the baby when the countertops are installed" (because we chose the sharp-edged, standard style, rather than the beveled edges, which cost $470 more). I laughed in her face, and said, "No, we won't." All the chaos suddenly stopped. I became the center of the adults' attention, and PP hid behind her mombie's leg, sucking her thumb and staring at me.

"Oh, I did have one question," I said to Agent Mommy. "By when do we need to drop off our ceiling lamp if we want your guys to install that instead of the standard chandelier?"

Chaos gradually resumed. A couple minutes later, SIL invited us to lunch. I accepted very sweetly. Fortunately for me, PP fell asleep on the ride there. The adults actually behaved like adults at lunch, except for SIL asking Alejandro to save some of his lunch (which we paid for) for little Sneauxphlayche.***



*She isn't any more, because I explained very firmly and clearly to the agents that although Alejandro's father would be purchasing the unit, Alejandro and I would be the actual occupants.
**More than enough, really.
***New Rule: You make it, you feed it.