Shit my dad says (nothing to do with the show or the book)

I've never watched the show or read the book. This is just a collection of some of the actual shit that has come out of my dad's mouth.

• "Obviously [Sarah Palin] is smarter than you, because she got elected governor and you didn't."
• "It's not cold; you just like to complain." (When it is 33 degrees and snowing.) 
• "It's not hot; you just want to spend money  on air conditioning." (When it is 85 degrees.)
• "Maybe you don't need that...that costs money. You know what else money buys? Oil." (When my brother said that he would like, not that he planned, to buy a 2TB external hard drive, because I was browsing for them online and showing him the ones I was considering.  Oil got thrown in there because my brother rents a house from my dad which has an oil furnace, and my dad had to pay for the most recent delivery of oil because my brother is out of work. It's not like he has money for oil and is spending it somewhere else, thus leaving my dad stuck with the oil bill. He doesn't have money. And he wasn't spending it, or planning to spend it.) 
• "Sheetz is for rich people." (He hates going out to eat, even if it involves stopping at the gas station for a bagel.) 
• "He was just trying to motivate you." (His spin on my former adviser's verbal abuse.) 
• "You take too long to shower...Washing your hair has nothing to do with it, it takes me 2 minutes and I wash my hair, too." (He is mostly bald. I have hair past my shoulder blades.)